Name Withheld netquiddler wrote in customers_suck
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From where quality comes first...
The stories you are about to read are true. The groceries have been changed to protect their expiration dates.

This is the city, Malaga, New Jersey. I carry a nametag.

It was Friday, November 16, 2012. It was cool in Malaga. We were working the day watch out of the front end. My partners are Buttercup, Princess of Hammersmith and Lisa, the Brony Scrapper. My supervisor is Genie, the Mighty Huntress Before the Lord. The boss is Bob, the Burgermeister Meisterburger. My name's Thursday; I’m a cashier.

I live for you and me… and now I really come to see… that life would be much better once you’re gone…

Our store has a deal every Thanksgiving where you can earn a free turkey, ham, turkey breast, lasagna, kosher chicken, or Tofurky® by spending a given amount over a six week period. This year’s promotion began on October 14 and extends through to Thanksgiving.

Originally, the deal required one to spend $400 to receive the free holiday item. However, when Hurricane Sandy hit, it caused quite a few of the stores up north to be closed for about a week. Because of this, and in an effort to allow more people to take part in the promotion, corporate lowered the qualifying threshold to $300 last Sunday.

Many customers were appreciative of the gesture (especially those who might have just missed earning their holiday item this time around); however one customer in particular was not. He had spent over $400 and had reached the qualifying mark before it had been reduced, and angrily noted that had he known we were going to lower the mark, he would have stopped at $300 and started again on a new card (as it’s a limit one offer per loyalty card).

He demanded that I transfer $100 in credit from his card to another card. I declined to do so, for two reasons: one, I am unable to perform that function on my register. Two, the only way that points can be transferred to a loyalty card is if the points are being transferred from a receipt that does not actually have a customer’s card on it (that is, if it’s the store’s default card, if the receipt has no loyalty card on it, or if a different store’s loyalty card accidentally scans.)

He gets angrier, and we start our way up the chain. Sam, our podium person, was the next to say no, it couldn’t be done, and then it was supervisor Donna’s turn to decline. Next, front end manager Jim said no, so it went to Bob. When Bob said no, the customer snapped. He said to Bob, “You’re not going to j** me out of this deal, are you, you f***ing k***? They should have killed you all off in the ‘40s!” This caused Bob to direct loss prevention to escort said customer from the store.

Well, I got home early one Monday… and much to my surprise… she was eatin’ chicken and dumplings… with some other guy…

One of the local brands of baked goods was purchased by a Mexican outfit. Since then, the Mexican company has been putting out bread under their own name, with a helpful reminder on the package as to how to pronounce that name. This bread has caused us to receive complaints for two reasons.

The first reason is that we should be selling American products only. Besides the fact that the bread is in fact baked in this country, I wonder if said customer also objects to companies like Lucky Goldstar selling popular products in this country.

The second reason, however, is that selling said Mexican brand of bread is degrading to women. Part of me understands this complaint; after all, there’s a reason that the package contains a reminder of how to pronounce it. However, the brand has been around for a little over 65 years now and its current meaning is completely coincidental.

And he played on the company bowling team, and every single night he had a strange recurring dream where he was wearing lederhosen in a vat of sour cream – but that’s really not important to the story…

Our store has a snack bar where one can purchase tasty comestibles. One of the perks of the snack bar is that if one purchases a fountain soda or a cup of coffee, one is entitled to free refills so long as one stays in the snack bar area. Indeed, the soda machine is located in the snack bar area so that our cashier does not have to refill a customer’s soda cup. However, one only gets the perk of free refills if one purchases the soda or coffee at the snack bar.

I was sitting in the snack bar area myself when a customer walked into the store with a McDonald’s branded cup, and filled it with ice and soda. This was noticed by the employee running the snack bar cash register, who told the gentleman that he couldn’t do that. The man responded with “But you guys give free refills!” Our employee reminds him that he had to buy the soda to get free refills. The customer stated he had no money, and left, full soda cup in hand. I am assuming loss prevention stopped him, however I cannot confirm this.

I’ve got lots of lovely lira, now the Deutsch Mark’s getting dearer, and my dollar bills would buy the Brooklyn Bridge…

It’s time for another Good Idea, Bad Idea.

Good Idea: At a regular register, requesting to bag your own groceries, when there is a bagger present.
Bad Idea: At a regular register, requesting to scan your own groceries, when there is a cashier present.

The End.

Re: the bread


2012-11-16 08:09 pm (UTC) (Link)

Oh, I know that bread. And yes, I'm one of those who was wondering why some bread company had chosen that. I'm given to understand it means something else in Spanish. At the time I was questioning the bread name, I didn't know it was spanish. (I thought it was some new bread company, and wondering if they were trying for some odd fetish market....)

Re: the bread


2012-11-16 08:39 pm (UTC) (Link)

Wiki says it doesn't actually mean anything in Spanish.

When they started selling Bimbo bread here I didn't realize it had been around for 65 years so I, too, thought it was a weird name - but I also didn't think that a company large enough to be selling their products at Wal Mart would intentionally pick an offensive name, so I assumed there was a reason behind it. :p AND LO.

(though now i can't stop thinkin' 'bout fetish bread)

Re: the bread


2012-11-16 09:38 pm (UTC) (Link)

I giggle when I see it on the shelf because I'm 12. I had to buy it because...bimbo. It's not bad bread.

I definitely appreciated your store reducing the amount you had to spend for the free turkey. Ours was closed for a whole week, and even still the shelves are not fully stocked. That first guy can bite me. I'm going to see if I can donate my free turkey somewhere.

Re: the bread


2012-11-17 10:42 am (UTC) (Link)

so i am not the only one who giggles when they see the bread?

Re: the bread


2012-11-18 05:55 pm (UTC) (Link)

Nope. I'm in my 30s and still giggle whenever I see it in the store here. And it's everywhere as I live in Arizona. :) :) :)

But, it's pretty damn tasty stuff that they make.

Re: the bread


2012-11-21 06:58 am (UTC) (Link)

oh, god so do I! We bought it because of the name, too.


2012-11-16 08:14 pm (UTC) (Link)

And now I'm deathly curious about what that bread is called...


2012-11-16 08:34 pm (UTC) (Link)

My best guess would be Grupo Bimbo (pronounced BEEM-bo.)


2012-11-16 08:40 pm (UTC) (Link)

It's called "Bimbo"! Imagine that loaves just start popping up on store shelves, emblazoned with that name, along with a tagline that said it's pronounced "Beeeembo". Which sounds so silly its a WTF all it's own.

The whole experience was so weird I stayed away from those products altogether. LOL.

Edited at 2012-11-16 08:42 pm (UTC)


2012-11-16 08:45 pm (UTC) (Link)

I'm guessing it's Bimbo

edit: oh wow, beaten so badly to the punch there haha

Edited at 2012-11-16 08:45 pm (UTC)


2012-11-16 08:41 pm (UTC) (Link)

I'm relieved that you're okay after the storm; I'd been wondering.

I remember that manufacturer's products from the summer I lived in Mexico. All of us (we were teens, on a volunteer project) giggled about it regularly, because we were teenagers. :-)


2012-11-16 08:50 pm (UTC) (Link)

I giggle about it too sometimes. Hence the idea it was some sort of 'fetish' bread, but only because I have an inner Beavis&Butthead. (Heh-heh-heh... s/he said balls...)


2012-11-16 09:14 pm (UTC) (Link)

The third one. What was the customer expecting the cashier to do, just stand back and do nothing? Hope the customer didn't have produce or the y wouldn't have known what to do.

Edited at 2012-11-16 09:14 pm (UTC)


2012-11-16 09:42 pm (UTC) (Link)

I have to laugh at the bread name thing, because we get their products all the time and I never really thought too hard about the name.


2012-11-16 10:56 pm (UTC) (Link)

I've missed your Dragnetesque posts! They always make me smile.

The random anti-semetism on the first one was... random. Oh New Jersey!


2012-11-17 01:42 pm (UTC) (Link)

we have a lot of jewish people in nj so im surprised the dude hasn't been beaten up for it >>


2012-11-18 02:21 am (UTC) (Link)

Yep that was my point. You'd think he would know better!! I'm so sorry you had to deal with that.


2012-11-17 12:17 am (UTC) (Link)

Not even gonna lie, I love the name Bimbo. I always laugh at it, even though I rarely buy their products.
And my god, anti-semitism is fun, right? I'm impressed your manager held it together enough to call security, I would have slapped that asshole.


2012-11-17 12:43 am (UTC) (Link)

Please tell me the first guy was banned? Please?


2012-11-17 04:07 am (UTC) (Link)

Seconded. I would have been all "Don't let the door hit you in the ass" on his lame self!


2012-11-17 01:43 am (UTC) (Link)

I have a feeling if the "Mighty Huntress" Was in the snack area she would have told the cashier to let the guy have it for free.

I bet if she was near the front when the guy came around she would have let him have it, even if loss prevention told her that "If we give him good customer service he will return" spiel she tends to use.


2012-11-17 04:08 am (UTC) (Link)

"But you give free refills!" Yeah, idiot, on *our* product, not McD's!



2012-11-17 04:17 am (UTC) (Link)

First guy gave me a legitimate creepy, violated feeling in my stomach. Which I don't usually get when reading things online. And I'm not even Jewish. ughghghgh.


2012-11-17 03:04 pm (UTC) (Link)

Yay! Weird Al for the third one. I know the fourth, but I can't place it, but I think it's Money Python?


2012-11-17 06:14 pm (UTC) (Link)

I was just coming to comment about how awesome the Weird Al lyric was too. ^_^


2012-11-17 08:10 pm (UTC) (Link)

I Googled it, and yes - the monEy song from monTy python.


2012-11-17 07:48 pm (UTC) (Link)

I can understand with the first story being a little peeved. But the way he went about it was all wrong.

Also, what is the name of the bread?

Edit: I read the comments and see that it is Bimbo. I've never even heard of that bread.

Edited at 2012-11-17 07:50 pm (UTC)


2012-11-19 06:33 pm (UTC) (Link)

Bimbo is some good stuff.


2012-11-17 08:04 pm (UTC) (Link)

OP : As a Dragnet / Adam-12 watcher (I found a new local non-cable tv channel that plays old tv series), I enjoy your post style. Keep it up!


2012-11-18 12:36 am (UTC) (Link)


I was wondering if you were all right after the storm.


2012-11-18 04:09 pm (UTC) (Link)

Ooh, I got one that I haven't been beaten to! Bread & Butter by the Newbeats!


2012-11-19 06:33 pm (UTC) (Link)

That first customer... if I had heard him, I would have taken a swing at him. What an asshole.

I'm $15 away from a free turkey! *flex* I love that you guys have Kosher turkeys as part of that promotion, even if it's just a discount.


2012-11-19 10:26 pm (UTC) (Link)

An aside: we also have kosher roasting chickens, and those are free.


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